The Declarer (Floyd McWilliams' Blog)

Friday, December 05, 2003

The wisdom of the Drug Czar and his minions never ceases:

"If, in the end, sport is only about the best pharmacology, then we should have robots competing against one another instead of humans."
-- Dr. Andrea Barthwell, of the White House Office of National Drug Control Policy, on the use of performance-enhancing drugs by athletes.

To paraphrase Strong Bad: "Dr. Barthwell, I'm not even gonna call you Dr. Barthwell. I'ma call you shithead." Barry Bonds is the greatest active baseball player. His job consists of deciding whether to swing at a little ball thrown at nearly 100 mph from 60 feet away, and if so, to hit it so that one of nine defensive players cannot catch it. Barry Bonds gets on base half the time. So, Shithead, if Bonds' ability is due solely to his big bulging biceps, then why has professional baseball not been taken over by bodybuilding stars and professional wrestlers?



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