The Declarer (Floyd McWilliams' Blog)

Monday, March 01, 2004

Who is the most despicable member of the House of Representatives? Now that Cynthia McKinney writes gushing letters to Saudi princes as a private citizen, the field is wide open.

I shall exclude those whose policies I find offensive; that includes all congresspersons, with the possible exception of Ron Paul (R-Galt's Gulch). And there's no reason to single out those, such as Helen Chenoweth (R-Black Helicopters), who are merely batty. (And Ms. Chenoweth is no longer in the House anyway.)

What of Bill Janklow (R-Irregularly Shaped Tundra), who killed a motorcyclist while running a stop sign? It's true that he had a history of speeding, and tried to escape punishment with a silly defense (that his diabetes made him disoriented). But Janklow did express contrition, and even resigned his office when found guilty. Who are we to fault Mr. Janklow just because he did not have access to the greasers and fixers who kept Ted Kennedy out of jail?

Janklow ran over a resident of his district. Congressmen are more likely to disgust us when standing up for their constituents rather than by running them down. Consider Robert Wexler (D-The Annoying Old Guy In Front Of You Who Argues With The Cashier About Egg Prices For Twenty Minutes). When voters in his Florida district were unable to comprehend a simple ballot, and wound up voting for Pat Buchanon to win American Idol, it was probably not realistic to expect Wexler to apologize for their senility. But did he have to rant and rave about how the butterfly ballots were impossible for the elderly to manipulate? (Were the instructions written by Pauly Shore?)

Still, it's hard to imagine that Wexler could maintain popularity with the geriatric residents of Florida unless he were possessed of some charm. Unlike people of my generation, the elderly have manners and standards. Wexler and his ilk are merely obnoxious, but Maxine Waters (D-Crackheads) is truly vile. She pandered to the 1992 Los Angeles rioters, saying of looters:

"There were mothers who took this as an opportunity to take some milk, to take some bread, to take some shoes. Maybe they shouldn't have done it, but the atmosphere was such that they did it. They are not crooks."

... One lady said her children didn't have any shoes. She just saw those shoes there, a chance for all of her children to have new shoes. Goddamn it! It was such a tear-jerker. I might have gone in and taken them for her myself."

Now there are plenty of stupid, well-meaning people who made excuses for criminals who took advantage of an opportunity to obtain free cigarettes, liquor, and televisions. But Waters went much further than that: She visited the home of Damian Williams, who was captured on tape attacking a truck driver with a chunk of concrete. Let me know when a Republican visits the jail cell of recently caught Olympic/abortion clinic bomber suspect Eric Rudolph.

Waters was recently in the news when she claimed that recently ousted Haiti president-cum-dictator Jean-Bertrand Aristide had been "kidnapped" by American forces. The "kidnapping," as related by Waters and Aristide, consisted of allegedly forcing Aristide into a plane, conveying him to the Central African Republic, and letting him go.

I suppose if Robert Mugabe ever receives his comeuppance, Maxine Waters will tell us that he was abducted by aliens.

But is it really reasonable for me to get so worked up over Waters? Every party has its nuts, right? Isn't Waters just one congressperson out of 435?

Tell it to Holy Joe Lieberman. Joe's schtick was that he cared more about God and morality than about politics. He was an "independent" Democrat who opposed affirmative action and supported school vouchers.

That was until Maxine Waters got ahold of him after he had been named the Vice Presidential nominee in 2000. She whined that she had not been consulted about the nomination, and demanded that Lieberman "explain himself." And that is exactly what Lieberman did! Lieberman abased himself in front of Waters at a Black Caucus meeting, "explaining" his deviations from Democratic orthodoxy until there weren't really any deviations at all.

Come to think of it, I guess there are worse things than being a thug, namely caving into one. But an examination of the most despicable Senators will have to wait until another time.



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